Finding The Positive in The Negative

Do you notice your energy draining just by being around Negative Nelly or Debbie Downer ? Having a rude nurse, a hostel waiter. What about the road hogs...now that's a whole lot of negative, right? Now don't get me wrong, I know we all have bad days, it's part of life. People living with Chronic illness always got a free pass in my book. But then I noticed by allowing the negative in, I had no room for positive. You can't have real joy and anger at the same time, try it...it doesn't work.

For me, I have to walk the walk. I needed to take myself out of toxic relationships in order to allow joy back into my life. That was the easy part. Finding out I too was a Debbie Downer, and I could blame others...well that just didn't add up. Sadly, as much as I wanted to fool myself I couldn't. It was then I decided I had to make a real honest effort at change, I wanted to be a better role model for my girls. I felt if not now, then when?

Dad always said “Crap or get off the pot”. As sweet as that statement was, I decided to put a more motivational spin on it. I left my self notes in various places. “Lets do this Mare”,

“You got this Mare”, “No, you are NOT lazy Mare”, and “You are LOVED”. I love the serenity prayer “God grant me the serenity to except the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”. I just love that ! Some times I add a line, “except _________ I can not change”. It helps.

Having Chronic illness does not mean I need to be chronically crabby. I allow my self time to vent via my journal, or calling a loved one. No matter what I follow it up with “Whats the silver lining, whats the lesson”? This keeps me sane. I won't let the beasts dictate my outlook any more. How I choose to deal with things effects everyone around me. Mom always said “Count to 10”. My serenity prayer is my “counting to 10”.

So, if you're having a downer day, a manic moment, or your beasts are behaving badly, give yourself a break, we all do. We just don't need to bring the rest of the planet down with us. Find your joy..and hang on to it for dear life :) It's all one day at a time....and that works for me.

“ Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice” ~ Wayne Dyer.

It's good to be back !

Feel's like forever since I've written.  Thats what happens when you battle the beasts, right?  Paying to much attention to the Fibro, and then Sarcoid throws a fit.  I imagine it's like having twins.  For me, the squeaky beast gets the most attention. They both run me into the ground...if I let them.  I get overwhelmed at times.


We've set up a "NO BEAST" zone at the dinner table.  That's our sacred family time...no phone calls, no beasts. My Hubby2B and I have date night...and I don't allow Fibro or Sarcoid to join us.  It's vital to have time to honor your whole self, the real you, the healthy you!   I know it's hard to think of ourselves as healthy when we deal with chronic illness, but we can't let our medical beasts win.  They don't own us.  The moment we give up ownership and allow the illness to define us, it's over.  


I am a Woman, a Mother, a Wife2B, a Sister, a Daughter, and an Aunt who lives with Sarcoidosis,  Fibromyalgia, and Chronic Pain.   This is my journey...and I will never surrender. 


"Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change" ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer.